It’s that Dragon Mart time of year
Chinese New Year in Dubai means two things: specials at Dubai’s Chinese restaurants, and lot of Western women lost in Dragon Mart (for the uninitiated, this is a mall the size of the universe [twice] that sells only things made in China).
I see the Western ladies there: like me, they’ve popped in for five minutes to pick up a shiny nylon outfit for their child’s school’s Chinese New Year celebrations but, two hours later, having wandered from section A to section G in search of ‘textiles’ (GA/GB if you’re wondering), they’re fanning themselves in the car park as they give directions to the Pakistani truck driver who’s to deliver to their home in The Villa 20 square metres of fake grass, a garden swing, a plastic slide set for the children, a crystal chandelier, 15 bougainvillea plants, a remote controlled helicopter, a fluffy beanbag, two carpets, a plastic cow that moos, dancing speakers, a tropical fish tank, a jellyfish, and a treadmill.
If they’ve done a thorough job, hidden in their handbags you may also find ‘hip-up gel’, horse shampoo, ‘snake serum’ for shiny hair, a fake designer bracelet, a golden waving Chinese cat, at least one pair of Brazilian fake-bum pants and a Minion iPad cover for the kids.
Kung Hei Fat Choy, ladies. See you there next year!