The aircraft seating plan
On your average Emirates Boeing 777, which seems to be the aircraft on which I always end up, the seating plan goes 3-4-3 (I’m telling you this for those who’ve never set foot in Economy – this is Dubai: There are a few people I know whose kids have never had to turn right).
So what do you do when you’re a family of four? Do you sit all in a row across the middle section and forgo any chance of seeing out of the window? Or do you go 2+2 in the window seats and suffer the chances of being seated next to an obese, sweating, garlic-breathed drunkard with a leaky bowel, who squeezes your bum as you climb over his lap every time DD calls you?
For this reason, we usually go for the middle four seats, but I’ve realised that I really hate being in the dim, dark centre of the plane. I’m much happier being just one or two seats away from the window – it’s kind of brighter, more bearable.
So on our next holiday, we’re sitting 2+2 in the ‘3’ rows.
“But who sits with (easy) DD and who sits with (more demanding) DS?” asked my French friend when we were discussing this the other day.
“Oh, that’s easy,” I said. “Neither of us. I’ll sit with DH, and we’ll clink glasses and casually point out the ‘unaccompanied minors’ to the cabin crew.”
My friend laughed like a drain. But seriously? I might try it.
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