Facial acupuncture – why would you (not)?
I’ve never been one to be too fussed by the eternal quest for youth – wrinkles, I believe, will come no matter what – but, since turning 40, I have to admit I’ve started to notice small changes in the texture and tone of my skin. A little sagginess, to be precise. A little dullness. Some unfortunate crumpling in the morning.
And, for a girl who thinks she’s still 25, it’s a bit disconcerting. My mumhas old skin – not me (she’ll kill me for saying that, so I’ll just add, that she actually has amazing skin for her age. “Just soap and water, dear, and a bit of goo from Avon.”)
Over the years that I worked as editor of a woman’s magazine, I tried creams, lotions and serums from every major and minor beauty house. I tried cutting-edge creams featuring scientific breakthroughs; organic herbal creams; creams that utilised the sound of potted whale music; ones that gave you electric shocks; and ones that had to be wiped on gently with the fur of a female rabbit under a full moon to the sound of violin music to reach their full potential.
Some have been okay; others most definitely not worth selling a kidney to buy but, again, none of them will do as much for you as will a good cosmetic procedure.
I have nothing against Botox and fillers, but I’m reluctant to go that route purely because I don’t think the results are as precise as customers may like to believe. Let’s face it: We’ve all seen faces in Dubai that show the evidence of Botox gone ever-so-slightly wrong. Yes, I mean you, Mrs I-Can’t-Smile. And you, Mrs Droopy Brow. And you, Mrs Lopsided.
So this year, as the facial crumpling started to last beyond 10am, I tried a couple of non-invasive treatments (infra-red skin-tightening to boost collagen – don’t bother). Today was the turn of facial acupuncture.
I’ve had medical acupuncture before, with major success, so I knew what to expect. I’d also read a little on the internet about it. Apparently, a course of 4-5 weeks can be as effective in lifting and rejuvenating the face as Botox, but without the poison and paralysis bit, and with the added bonus of increased circulation which leads to the holy grails of G.L.O.W. and R.A.D.I.A.N.C.E.
Sounds good, yeah?
So, after a consultation (“How much do you drink, Mrs Dubai?” “Three glasses a night, doctor.” “What? Water?” “No. Sauvignon.”) the lovely doctor explained he was going to work as well on detoxing my body and boosting circulation as there was no point in working only on the face (it’s a “holistic” treatment, natch).
“Will I be able to see a difference after today?” I asked eagerly.
“Yes,” he said. “Some people notice their skin is very shiny.”
Great – an hour of needles and I get a shiny face.
So the good doctor slid 14 needles into my face (only a little ouch-y on two) and then 14 into my body and left me alone “for 15 minutes”, with a lovely heater directed on my bare tummy. “Don’t move,” he said, “or it might hurt.”
Grateful for the extra nap time, I promptly fell asleep to the sound of tinned birdsong. Much later I began to worry that the doctor had forgotten me and nipped out to Starbucks – but how can you jump up and open the door when you’ve 28 needles stuck in your body? I dared to lift my be-needled arm and look at my watch. Forty-five minutes had passed.
I’d better bloody look 25 after this, I thought.
And do I? Of course not. But I will try to go once a week for the next 4-5 weeks, after which the doctor said we should definitely be seeing some quite permanent lifting and radiance results that require only limited top-ups.
Believe, or don’t believe – it’s got to be better than Botox. You can read more about facial acupuncture for anti-ageing here. Meantime, I will keep you posted.