Dubai's Desperate Housewife

Trials and traumas of a full-time mum in Dubai

Of improvements: Home and self

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We had some work done on the house while we were away: We had the cherry woodwork painted white. I’d like to say it was because, being a writer, I can concentrate better in a neutral environment but, honestly, the cherry finish was just horrible.

So we came back to a very white house that stank to high heaven of paint. And I don’t just mean stank – I mean gave us sore throats and blocked-up noses despite every window of the house having been open for days. Two weeks later, it’s still a bit whiffy.

“Can’t you get odourless paint here?” I asked the foreman. Apparently not. Well, not from Cheapo Local Paints Inc, from where these guys buy their supplies (“top quality special paint, madam” – yeah right!).

Anyway, having the paintwork done has taught me a valuable lesson. For all those who’ve ever thought about a lunchtime nip or tuck and the surgeon’s office, I can’t help drawing a parallel between home improvements and cosmetic surgery.

You see, the woodwork now looks amazing. It’s a gleaming, dazzling, light-reflecting, house-enlarging white, and I love it. But, the new woodwork has shown up every other bit of the house that now needs attention. The walls (magnolia) are now showing their age against the dazzling white, with fingerprints, smudges and scuffs shown off beautifully. And the floor and bathroom tiles – never great – now look even worse alongside such beauty.

And (bear with me, I’m getting to the point)…

… I have to wonder: Is it the same with cosmetic surgery?

As in, you start with a little harmless tooth-whitening, but then you notice your wrinkles more, so you have a little Botox in your forehead, but then the crow’s feet then look more obvious, so you have a little bit more Botox, but then your naso-labial lines look too deep so you have a cheeky filler (“very natural”), and then maybe a little brow lift and some laser-resurfacing to give a good finish?

And by then the Botox has worn off but the fillers haven’t, so you have a bit more Botox to even it all out because your cheeks now look 30 while your forehead looks 45….  do you get my drift?

So, back to the house.

“Oh,” said DH, after his eyes had grown accustomed to the new brightness of our igloo-like abode, “the floor looks a bit sad now, doesn’t it? And, is it just me, or do the walls need repainting?”

The more I think about it, the more I feel I’m right. This, my friends, is why cosmetic surgeons are so rich. Beware the slippery slope.

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Written by mrsdubai

March 1, 2011 at 9:36 pm

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